pain

December 8, 2011 § Leave a comment

like dragging my feet
through tall grass
after the rain

like waist deep
in the river current
during spring run off

like polar fleece pajamas
in flannel sheets
with a heavy quilt

cant move
cant breath

alone at night
i wake up
yelling at something

grief
regret
unknowing

my eyes only have
the paper wasp
out on the deck

slowly masticating the railing
into a new home

my ears only have
the sweet plaintive cry
of the osprey down the ravine
taking another large catch
to the chicks in the nest

at my feet
the large native slug
i almost stepped on

tendrils
casually
extended
inquiring on the next
dewy leaf

days are getting out of bed
chasing away the pain
stretching out
waking

stepping into the world
pushing into the car
smoking another cigarette
telling my mind
to stop racing

stumbling home
putting ice on my back
sleeping away
the sunny afternoon
wondering how
i am ever going
to walk upright
again.

i have to believe
that the nature of my being
is to heal
to heal the pain of my body
to heal the pain of my heart
to heal the pain of my mind.

grateful, i will be grateful
that my eyes open today
that the movement hurts just a little bit less
that i can raise
the cup
to my hungry mouth.

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